Step three, eat something

The world population of young people need a new vision of quality. They have lived so long without feeling anything authentic, that they wilt when they find themselves in the presence of greatness. My first high school English teacher Bob Hyatt asked my freshman class if any of us had ever heard an actual radio show. Not just music or news but actual radio shows. The kind he grew up on. Now strange exhibits in the radio museum of public radio. Shows like Portland's Livewire and the ever present Prairie Home Companion. When Hyatt asked us this with a distinct sense of sadness on his breath, he was hoping that we might see the error in our technological eighties decade. Realize plastic was not always better that metal and that it was not about returning to the past as much as holding onto quality. Quality can be innovative by the way, check out the small upstarts of self designers who populate the blogosphere. Dusting off the past and bringing the kickass out of its molecules.

One, yes one block exactly from my house is a giant village of college age drinkers and fornicators. Thousands of pre-adults on individual mass missions of gettin' The Gettin' movement is pretty easy to join and simple to explain. People gettin' drunk and people gettin' laid. In that order.

Shane, Nikki Leone, and I have conversed regularly on the lack of quality late night eating in town. We have struggled with understanding why there is no perfect dive to lurk in the back booth of, we are completely without a quality late night hangout. Do you know what that does to a gang. It is very hard to plan a grand adventure and heist if we have no headquarters to sit and draw on napkins while debating the jukebox agenda. I believe this lack of hang out is due in part to the complete lack of the Gettin' group to appreciate the time honored tradition of extending the hunt, don't jump in the sack immediately and don't get so blotto that you find yourself sleeping sitting straight up on a couch with four other dudes. How can you ever impress a someone enough to want to hold your hand if they only ever see you drunk and muted out by the house music. You can't sound witty, you can't seem cool for listening. You just have to stand around saying silly phrases like, what department you in? Come on young fellas, get some class, get some grace, get some god-damn aplomb.

Here is the bottom line, I got nowhere to take the Giddy-Up, I got nowhere to take the boys when they come down, I got nowhere to build my new crew. How can you have a crew without a hangout? Its downright criminal and its all the fault of these Gettin' guys. They need some charm school. Maybe that will be the way to do this. Maybe I need a charm school slash breakfast sandwich shop, perfect.

Patrick Melroy

Nikki Leone- smile like toothpaste add, hits like a hammer, girl got martial art skills. She makes no separation between the arts, they are all valuable. Nikki is new to my vocabulary but she has proved impossibly valuable as an ally. Often, when in a lecture and I think I must be the only one thinking this guy is crazy, afterwards Nikki tells me that guy was crazy and I feel I am not the only peasant who thinks the emperor is butt naked and struttin in the wind.
Oh and she makes asskickin art.


  1. Well hello there Patrick. I have just spent my afternoon at work reading the entirety of this blog you have here. It reads well as one solid chunk, if you ever wondered. I can't wait to see the results of your grad school work. You have always been impressive, and I have no doubt the work will be (is) also.

  2. I second that. All of that. About the severe and devastating lack of quality, even up here in Rochester (yet one more area of the U.S. that was a true tragedy to ruin), and about the ass-kickin-ness of Nikki Leone.

  3. I third that and have friends and relatives that are so waisting their lives doing the same things you mentioned . The food is good up here in the northwest and lots of spots to go , but I know what you mean about the hangouts. I remember when I was a teanager we had great places to go and not have get smashed and we could spend hours . Everything is moving so fast now noboby has time for such foolishness . I have listened to lots of radio shows in the olden days and I have listened to many Prarie Home Companion shows and saw the movie a few years ago. Let us know when you find your spot and we will be down. A Digital Old Man

  4. Please include this in your Book of a Thousand Ideas: A charm school/breakfast sandwich shop. Every town needs one. Digital Grandma K

  5. Yes, it is sad that this place doesn't have a "basement restaraunt that serves really great beer/drinks and magical cuisine." I never thought I'd miss Richmond VA as much as I am. It's more for those great bars that we could all gather, listen to some bad ass fucking music while drinking our chocolate stouts and eating a vegan chocolate cake after a delicately blackened fish lightly seasoned with great fried okra and a hicama salad. Or, go to a game/trivia night watching people chug beers at the same time they're drawing art and eating a bowl of peanut butter and jelly, just to win a free bar tab...while eating massive amounts of sushi named Godzirra and G.I. Janes and popping handfulls of crispy hot tater tots dipped in the japanese mayo/spicy sauce. We will soon develope a place to call our own. we'll find our "home." it just takes some time to feel stuff out first...feel it out and then conquer!

  6. wait, let's try that again....
    "feel it out and then CONQUER!" KEEYAH! *insert ninja moves here*


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